First of all I don't know a thing about the game of hockey. I know that the ball is called a "puck" and is more like a cylinder. I know the goalee wears scary masks, and that most of the guys have a few teeth missing. But here is what I learned at my new favorite sporting event:
- They have to put the words of the national anthem up on the JumboTron because there are too many Canadians in the house.
- The goalee can actually leave his goal, thus having it exposed, to talke a breather! What a wuss!
- The crowd only gets into it if there are fights or goals made. Otherwise they are completely oblivious to the goings on.
- Mullets are the "in" hairdo at hockey games.
- The refs rarely call penalties becuase they have to much fun watching the guys kill each other.
Layne & I went with a bunch of her friends from work. I love to be at sporting events. Any of them. By then end of the game I had deduced (by analogy to other sports) that slashing is like fouling in basketball - even though it is against the rules, awlays do it on purpose. There is off sides, like in soccer, but I had no clue what it meant. At one point I leaned over to the guy on my rigth and said, "just thought you should know - I have no clue what just happened." I told him I just jeer with everyone else, clap when they clap and use phrases like "good stop" and "tough D". I mean, you can use those in any sport, right?
And to get on to other matters, I found a crack pipe, crack, and a needle in a car the other day. Someone left it in a pari of shoes under the seat. I wore the shoes, but threw out the cronic...it's ironic. Snoop would be pissed. he probably wouldn't call me Dogg anymore....oh well.
Go see a hockey game. Go with a girl. Have a hot dog and chili cheese fries. Grow a mullet. And then smoke some crack. Yum yum getcha sum.
joshua
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