I expected to be making more than I am. Rent is high here, at least for me. I chose to live somewhere where I didn't fear the neighbors and it was a good choice. Then you add up cost of living, including food, utilities, and little luxuries that really take their toll...the internet, full coverage car insurance, a cell phone with enough minutes for me to feel important. I am not asking for a pity party because we all have the bills to pay. All I ask for is for each one of you reading this, no matter how many or few - to take a moment to realize all the important things in your life, and that none of them can be priced. Not one.
I made a hard decision today. I called my good friend Chitty and told him that I would not be able to afford a plane ticket to fly down for his wedding, in which I was an attendant. Unexpected tires for my vehicle ate my "fun" allowance. He took it well, suggesting that we simply put a manequin in my place. I am sure it would work: perfect features, proportionate arm mass to torso - everyone would know who it would represent. Honestly, it was a very hard thing to do. I am sure he will be sad and have to scramble to find someone to replace me in the lineup, but the real truth set in: we're not in Kansas anymore.
I could charge a ticket - yes, I could. And then pay it off later - yes, I could. And thus begins the story of so many who are in debt by the tens of thousands. My friends and relatives have been there. But instead of staying in OK where the cost of living is lower, gas is cheaper and friends are 2hours away, I took a risk... a true leap of faith...in fact, the 2nd largest one of my life (second only to the choice to stay in Colorado to see what, or "who", the Lord had waiting for me at Deer Valley). So here I am, living the American dream. And truely loving every minute of it.
So when you go to bed tonight, say a short prayer of Thanksgiving for what you have been given. I have so much here - a roof, food on the table every night, a steady income, faith in the Lord, and a wonderful woman who cried for me tonight because I won't be able to go see my friends. Her heart is so much kinder than mine. She really was sad for me...wanted it to work, but I told her this was an adventure...
So to my friends in Oklahoma - I miss you, and will until we see each other again. Although I am unsure how long it will be, know that you are my friends no matter where we are and someday our kids will still get a chance to play together while we barbeque.
"You never said it would be easy, you only said I'll never go alone"..."All I hath needed Thy hand hath provided, great is Thy faithfulness, Lord unto me..."
One for the homies, and Bear...
j holland fuller
1 comment:
Josh,
I think my words on this subject are best in letter form. I will send snail mail.
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